After yet another night of staying up late, hanging with friends, (did we really discuss Kaitlyn Jenner, Cory Booker, Anderson Cooper, and the new and improved clitoral vibrator in the same conversation—or did my brain make that up after downing that second glass of wine? Where did I hear that Cory Booker had been in the military? Uhhh!)— it suddenly dawned on me that I hadn’t packed for my trip to California. “No problem, I don’t need to pack that much. It’s only us,” I thought. “Only us.”
It’s only us!!
It’s just Boky and I in the desert for four days sans; 2 little heathen kids, 1 moody as hell teenager, 3 dogs, 2 cats, nannies, clients/work, friends, and a house that seems to manufacture something for me to repair every time I turn around.
After emptying my pajama drawer, throwing together some hiking gear, and deftly deciding on the perfect music festival shoes; I was overcome with the kind of giddiness a teenager has when they are about to be out of their parents’ control for the first time–except it’s not my parents I’m escaping from, but the daily collusion of shit that has to get done that controls my days.
And I am about to be Free! Free! Free!!!
Hear me Coco Barkey?! You incontinent, yet adorable little Quasimodo looking dog, that leaves hidden presents everyday all over the house for me to find and clean. I never scold you because you can’t help it and I see that in those ridiculously big, brown, sad eyes! You will be missed– along with the rest of the fur-babies, but you will be well taken care of while mommy gets a little space from Bounty paper towels, dog scoopers, and amino clean-up spray.
Free! Free! Free!
Do you hear me kiddos? You know that I love you guys! I’m there for you pretty much every morning, afternoon, and night. You tear pieces out of my soul when you fight with each other, hide, or throw away my jewelry and draw with permanent markers on the art that I collect. I give you nothing but acceptance and a stoic resignation that you will all outgrow this phase—emerging as wiser, older people who are somewhat reasonable—one can hope. Someone said “You will miss this phase when they are grown.” I don’t believe that at all!
Free! Free! Free!
Do you hear me friends? I love seeing your beautiful faces,supporting the various causes that are close to your heart, celebrating/crying with you— but I need a break! We have plenty of time in this life–or the next to hang out. I’m sure you need to get away from me, as well. Hell, I need a break from me!!
That’s why I’m going into the desert to watch the winds whip the sands over glistening, painted hills of rock. I’m going to listen to my favorite bands, converged in a mirage that hovers in the desert for two weekends, once a year– surrounded by strangers, united temporarily by a common love of music and wannabe-Woodstock-looking-fashion.
Free! Free! Free!
I’m going to be “just Audra” and he’s going to be “just Boklyn.” We’re going hiking, hanging with the locals, and eating/drinking our way through Palm Springs.
There may be a yoga class, a spa day, or ‘hanging by the pool while I read a book moment’ — all interspersed with amazing, live music and lots of dancing to get my energy jazzed.
I only know one thing—without any pretense of certainty.
I am taking a few days to be free—- even if that’s an illusion. ?
1 comment
Hello! Cool post, amazing!!!
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